My son & his girlfriend are expecting twins Sept.1. A boy & a girl. They are first time parents. I had six of my own but times have changed my youngest being 16. I was wondering what kind of advise you could give them & what kind of help or resourses they could get for having an extra passenger? She will stay home with the babies & he works night shift. He is 21 & she 18. He makes too much for her to qualify to get WIC. Thank you & God bless you & your family.
Congratulations Grandma!! This is so exciting. It's super scary to find out you're having twins for anyone, but especially as first time parents and young ones at that. Sometimes I wonder if it would've been easier for us to have the twins first because then any kids that follow will seem like a breeze. I have all kinds of advice having just gone through the first 6 months of being a twin mom.
Feed the babies at the same time! Breastfeeding saves tons of money. If she's gonna be a stay at home mom breastfeeding should be easy. Get a My Brest Friend Twin Nursing pillow. She may think there's no way she'll make enough milk to feed two babies, but you make as much as you need so it's not a problem. Drink lots of water to keep milk supply up. Pumping and feeding doesn't generate as much milk and it takes twice as long to feed your babies that way when you're a twin mom you don't have that kind of time :)
Keep them on the same feeding and sleep schedule if possible. Then mom can catch a nap.
You don't need two of everything just most things. 2 cradle swings, 2 bouncy chairs, 2 cribs (my twins shared one for the first 2 1/2 months), 2 high chairs, 2 bumbo or bebe floor seats.
We got by with 1 floor gym, but my baby sitter has 2 and it works out better.
1 diaper bag with two personalized bags that fit inside they'll share a lot, but not everything. My friends twins needed to use different kinds of formula and different kinds of bottles. One twin may be bigger than the other so putting their spare outfits in individual bags labeled will help anyone babysitting find the right outfit in case of a blowout. It's not a bad idea to keep pacifiers and teething rings separate too. We color coordinate. They should each have their own medicine dropper and their own booger sucker (the hospital will give these to mom).
Get a variety of different bottles babies are picky especially if they prefer the breast, but mom can't always be there. Pumps are covered under Obamacare now so tell her not to buy one ahead of time. Ask the lactation consultant or nurse to order one for her.
She can also save a ton of money by making her own baby food. It's easy and fun.
As far as making it through the pregnancy, it's tough and there are a lot of risk factors working against her. Drink tons of water. When she thinks she's drinking so much water she may float away she needs to drink more. At least 1 glass every hour is what they told me. Keep stress levels down. Take it easy! Rest a lot. Don't lift anything. If she exercised regularly keep it up but drop the intensity level. This is not the time to start exercising or dieting. Eat healthy foods. Don't spend too much time standing up. See a chiropractor to relieve lower back and hip pain...she will have both way worse than a singleton pregnancy. Lotion lotion lotion to try to cut down on the stretchmarks. She'll get them either way, but it does help a little. Remind her she's earned her stripes.
As far as resources go, she should ask her doctor. I know Ministry offers a ton of different classes to help parents be better prepared. We took all of them and I'm glad we did.
There are going to be a ton of doctor appointments and tests and ultrasounds so ask lots of questions.
This is the best advice I can lend: Work together. It takes two loving people to raise twins. It takes lots of patience and lots of support. Accept help from anyone and everyone who offers it. Otherwise the housework will never get done and she may never shower. Enjoy every moment even the tough ones because time goes too fast. For every tough moment there are a dozen that you want to hold onto.
It's hard at times, but so rewarding.
I hope all goes well. Please keep me posted.
Do you have any additional advice for Connie's son and girlfriend?
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